Faux News Network’s Zaftan 31B reporter, Chazerei filed this report.
The Zaftan home world is aflame today as demonstrations and even riots broke out in major cities in response to Hank Quense’s new series of ebooks, the Zaftan Troubles.
The press secretary of the Dictator issued a statement: “This cretin author dares to depict the zaftans as aggressors in their dealings with the Gundies. These books are nothing more than a rewrite of history and is pure fabrication. We zaftans were generous to a fault in our handling of diplomatic relations there despite the despicable responses of the Gundies
The Vice-Dictator, in an interview said, “Quense speaks of treachery and assassination as if they’re bad things and not social amenities.”
Thousands of copies of the ebooks have been printed and were used to burn the author in effigy yesterday. Ritual burnings took place in dozens of cities and towns across the planet.
Finally, the Dictator issued a blanket arrest warrant for the author. Once apprehended, he will be subjected to the 45-day torture test. If he survives, he’ll be found not guilty and set free. So far, no one has survived past 25 days.
FNN will continue to monitor this breaking news story.