Moxie’s Problem

Do you enjoy non-typical coming-of-age stories? Well, you won’t get more untypical than this one.

Keep in mind, this is Camelot in a parallel universe!

 

Moxie, the title character, is an obnoxious, spoiled teenage princess. Percivale is an apprentice Knight of the Round Table. These two and another pair of apprentice knights have a number of unusual adventures. Both Moxie and Percivale learn from their experiences and change.

Meanwhile, there are problems in Camelot. King Artie and Hengist, a Saxon warlord, struggle against each other to claim victory on the football field of honor. Lancelot, the head of the Knights of the Round Table and KRT Inc has problems getting the coins to fund the Step-dancing troupe, the Mens Choir and the KRT Players. In his spare time, he has to fight Saxons and defend the queen. Merlin is engaged in research into the Magic of the Mind using ink blots on pieces of parchment and in defending his title as the Smoke Master of all Britain.

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To whet your appetite, here is the cast of characters:

Major Characters

* Princess Moxie: an obnoxious, self-centered teenager who has to figure out how to get a life.

* Percivale: an apprentice knight who has many strange adventures and meets many strange women including Moxie

* Gareth: Percivale’s buddy and another apprentice knight. Gareth has a passion for cooking.

* Bors: Still another apprentice knight and friend to Gareth and Percivale. Bors likes to count money and audit scrolls to catch tax thieves.

* Artie: Count of the Southern Shore and a football affectionado. Later King of Camelot

*Merlin: Court wizard. Fascinated by the Magic of the Mind and undertakes to master it using ink blobs on scraps of parchment.

* Hengist: Saxon war chief. Artie’s nemesis and all around bad guy.

Knights of the Round Table (KRT) Executive Board

* Lancelot: CKO (chief knightly officer). Also captain of the KRT football team and their star striker. Principal leaper in the KRT step-dancing troupe. Also defender of Queen Guinevere

* Gawain: Sergeant-at-arms. Mostly interested in chasing anyone wearing a kirtle. He is Gareth’s older brother

Galahad: a religious fanatic and the bishop’s representative (and spy) Is the goalie on the KRT football team

Ector: Treasurer. Considered too old to be bothered stealing from the treasury

* Tristan: Head of the Arts and Entertainment Committee. Camelot’s Bard-in-Residence and the worst poet in Western Civilization.

* Kay: Head of the Pension Fund and the Widows & Orphans Fund. Gets to meet a lot of pretty widows, all of them angry at him.

* Palimides: Head of Marketing and Sales. Believed to be a marketing marvel because he came from a different country and culture.

Minor Characters

* Rowan: a powerful sorceress and acolyte to the Lady of the Lake. On loan to Camelot to coach the football team. Merlin’s main squeeze.

* Queen Guinevere: Artie’s wife and the coach of the KRT cheerleader squad.

* King Smedley: Moxie’s father who doesn’t understand why Moxie won’t get married and have a son to inherit the crown.

*Orrin. Moxie’s uncle. Fat, greedy and sneaky. Wants Smedley’s crown for his young son.

Guest characters

*Wryd Sisters continue their 30-year quest to lose their virginity.

* Robbin’ ‘Oody and Maid Marian hang out in Sherwood Forest and taunt the sheriff.

* Mark, King of Cornwall

* Isolde, Irish princess and bride of Mark